I woke up this morning feeling a little down. It seems like that happens a little more often than it did in the past. Don’t feel bad for me, I have no excuse. I have a loving wife and children who say they love me. Not because I have done anything on purpose to make them feel this way. When questioned about their behavior, they say it is just because I am their dad. Who am I to question their superior thought process? So somewhere in my musing they listened to me, which brings me to this week’s column. I will say that this is pretty cool.
A few months ago my oldest son came to his mother and me and said that over the years he had compiled a list. “What kind of list?” I asked. “A list of life lessons learned from you, Dad. I have reached the magic number of 50 and would like to share them with you.” As I went through the list, I was taken aback by some of the lessons he heard. I would like to share some of these with you today. I promise to only share the ones that I can. For those of you that are fathers, I think you understand.
#1 – Your brother is the only person you have in the world that you can trust 100%.
#2 – Your sister will someday find a man, and may have to choose him over you. Do not be offended by this, for that is the duty of a wife to her husband.
#3 – Should that relationship fail, be prepared to defend her, at all costs.
#4 – As the oldest son, you are responsible for all actions taken by your younger brother; if he fails, you fail.
#5 – Face the door in a restaurant and identify all exit doors. (This one makes all of us laugh because the entire family does this.)
#6 – Don’t be a victim, be accountable for your actions.
#7 – If someone tells you something can’t be done or isn’t possible, don’t believe them. There is always another way.
#8 – Clothes need to be ironed.
#9 – Never gamble if your name is Worthy, we aren’t good at it, it’s in the blood.
#10 – Always pay your debts.
#11 – Comparing your self to others is the killer of joy.
#12 – It’s never too late to try something new. (This one is one of my favorites as Lorraine has told me several times that I have climbed the mountain and jumped off over and over.)
#13 – Ford over Chevy, Harley over every other bike.
#14 – Don’t drink and drive.
#15 – Never apologize at a traffic stop, it automatically renders you guilty.
#16 – Always brown shoes with a brown belt, black shoes with a black belt.
#17 – Respect the flag, respect your country, take your hat off during the National Anthem.
#18 – Call your mother more often and tell her you love her.
#19 – Ask yourself what your mother would think before you make a decision.
#20 – Be a man.
There are many more that Austin has shared with our family, but for now these are the ones that I wanted to share with you.
As I reflect on Austin’s lessons learned, I am reminded of my own dad and the lessons he taught me. For example: “Don’t be afraid, cuz God never gives you more than you can take.” The word caint (can’t) was not part of his vocabulary, he would say, “Maybe you’re just having a little trouble.”
My dad had one leg two inches shorter than the other and I never really noticed until I was a teenager. That taught me never to complain. As my dad grew older, he realized and passed on to me that alcohol never solves anything, and lastly he taught me to fly. It took me a long time to realize that when he let me go, it wasn’t that he didn’t care, he just wanted me to have more.
When I joined the army, I was able to use those lessons that dad taught me when things got hard. Discipline comes to mind as we learned early on in the Worthy household that no one got off easy. When I was trained in boot camp, my commanding officers pushed me hard, but I never gave up because that’s what I learned from dad. As the years went by and I was promoted to captain, I did my best to train my men the way my dad trained me.
I don’t think when you are a boy you realize how important your dad really is. They are your first teacher and mentor. I don’t think I would be the man I am today without his guidance. Sure I have had many people who have come along who have taught me, but my dad was the first and most important.
You really never know if what you say to your kids will have an impact or a lasting impression. But today I can honestly say I am proud to be their dad and wish that my dad could have known them. I’m sure like me you may not always be proud of decisions made. But as we enter into the Christmas season, I’m reminded of what is asked of us. It always seems to be a time where everyone is running around trying to get everything done. But really this should be a time of reflection and peace.
I started out by saying I was a little down. I don’t feel that way now as writing always gives me a sense of purpose. This week, do something good for someone else, who knows who might be watching. Have a good couple of weeks and I’ll be back on the 17th.
God Bless.
